A Prayer When Feeling a Bit Restless and Antsy
Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him. Truly he is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken. My salvation and my honor depend on God; he is my mighty rock, my refuge. Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge. Ps. 62:5-8
Gracious Father, nothing compares with being certain of your love for me. The peace and freedom that come from knowing we don’t have to pose, pretend or perform, with you about anything is incomparable, and cannot be found anywhere else. The gospel put an end to my old “he loves me; he loves me not; he loves me; he loves me not” spirituality.
Today, in particular, I’m thankful for the unfettered freedom to pour out my heart to you. Because of your grace, I don’t have to measure my feeling and words with you. You don’t judge my prayers. You purify them by the Spirit, as they wing their way to heaven. How I praise you for such a standing in grace!
So here’s what’s going on inside of me today. I feel a restlessness that I cannot really attach to any one thing. There’s a floating disquiet, a nibbling anxiousness, a low rumble of dis-ease that’s just hanging there. It could easily morph into something much bigger if I’m not connected to you in a fresh and vital way.
So today, I echo back to you King David’s longing for soul rest, and I make his prayer my own. “Soul, find your rest in God alone. Don’t medicate with anything else. Don’t run to broken cisterns, pseudo-lovers or heart idols. Don’t default to trying to be your own savior. Don’t minimize or super-size your restlessness. Just go to Jesus with it. Run to him right now!”
Indeed, Lord Jesus, I don’t want to waste energy on the “paralysis of analysis.” I don’t want to spend time navel gazing today. I don’t want to treat my soul like an onion to be peeled, layer by layer. Whatever is repent-able or repairable, I’m sure you’ll show me. I just want you, Lord Jesus. I ask you to bring your centering presence, your stabilizing mercy, and your calming peace to my soul.
I do trust you, Jesus, at this time, even as I want to trust you at all times. You are my rock, my salvation, my fortress, my honor, my refuge; and a whole, whole lot more King David didn’t mention in this psalm! So very Amen I pray, with hope and anticipation.