Comments on: Raising Kids in a Pornified Culture http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/2013/02/27/raising-kids-in-a-pornified-culture/ Sun, 19 May 2013 21:45:50 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.2 By: Anonymous http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/2013/02/27/raising-kids-in-a-pornified-culture/#comment-75539 Anonymous Sat, 04 May 2013 11:47:56 +0000 http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/?p=32151#comment-75539 Dear Alien and Stranger, I agree, there aren't any guarantees when raising children. They choose their own path in life. A friend of mine went to a wise pastor with her concerns about her adult children's spiritual lives. Pastor: Did you raise them to know right and wrong? Mother: Yes. P: Did you tell them about Jesus Christ? M: Yes. P: Did you pray for them? M: Yes. P: Then you did your responsibility. She found that to be very freeing. Dear Alien and Stranger,

I agree, there aren't any guarantees when raising children. They choose their own path in life.

A friend of mine went to a wise pastor with her concerns about her adult children's spiritual lives.

Pastor: Did you raise them to know right and wrong?
Mother: Yes.
P: Did you tell them about Jesus Christ?
M: Yes.
P: Did you pray for them?
M: Yes.
P: Then you did your responsibility.

She found that to be very freeing.

]]> By: Alien & stranger http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/2013/02/27/raising-kids-in-a-pornified-culture/#comment-75103 Alien & stranger Wed, 01 May 2013 14:14:54 +0000 http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/?p=32151#comment-75103 I've come across this article well-after the fact, and agree with some of the things in the comment above mine. One thing we need to acknowledge is the innate sin-nature, with which we and our children come into this world. With 20/20 hindsight, I know it manifested in me as a child. I heard things from children at school when I was in Gr. 5, and happened to come across some Men Only magazines with very mild (by today's standards) cartoons and photos (no full nudity back then), and that triggered curiosity in me. Once I learned "the facts of life" when I was about 11 or 12, I realised what I'd been doing was wrong. However, when I was 21, I met my future husband, with whom I fell madly in love, and he then seduced me and introduced me to porn. After we were married, a situation that had developed made me realise how much my morals were off kilter with the sexual licence, but it was really only years later, after our sons were born and I came to know the Lord, that I was set free from all the sexual fantasy stuff. Being worried about drug-scares and HIV/Aids, I first took my sons to Sunday School, even before I knew the Lord, as I knew nothing about teaching my sons moral values. Once I came to know the Lord, and I now understood humankind's innate proclivity to depravity, I began to teach my sons Biblical truth and values, and the reasons for those values. (I carried the load of moral and spiritual training, as my atheist husband wasn't interested, being more concerned that our sons become computer-literate, so eventually they became addicted to computer-gaming). During their primary school years I told them why porn, sexual licence, drugs, cigarette smoking, etc., were detrimental, e.g. I told them that porn puts images in their minds that were difficult to erase, that it is addictive and progressive, like drugs, and that it is like drinking from a sewer instead of a pure spring (using the Biblical analogy), and that it perverts God's plan for marriage and sexual relations. Because I knew what a toxic culture we live in, I wanted my sons to "own" the values as their own, not as rules or orders from me. This helped them to withstand many temptations (including internet porn) during their high school teen years, because before they had begun high school, all our sons prayed for salvation as the Lord intervened in their lives, but one later turned away from the Lord and has led an immoral life, despite all my prayers and input, and has become a hardline atheist in the Dawkins mold. He now considers porn less harmful than smoking cigarettes! I've learned that there are no guarantees when raising children, probably more so if the parents aren't "reading off the same page". I've felt some envy as I've watched other people's children grow into godly young people who love the Lord - but then other people's children haven't. There are hopes and dreams for my family that have turned to ashes, but I still believe God has his hand on their lives and will work in their lives in his timing. I've come across this article well-after the fact, and agree with some of the things in the comment above mine. One thing we need to acknowledge is the innate sin-nature, with which we and our children come into this world. With 20/20 hindsight, I know it manifested in me as a child. I heard things from children at school when I was in Gr. 5, and happened to come across some Men Only magazines with very mild (by today's standards) cartoons and photos (no full nudity back then), and that triggered curiosity in me. Once I learned "the facts of life" when I was about 11 or 12, I realised what I'd been doing was wrong.
However, when I was 21, I met my future husband, with whom I fell madly in love, and he then seduced me and introduced me to porn. After we were married, a situation that had developed made me realise how much my morals were off kilter with the sexual licence, but it was really only years later, after our sons were born and I came to know the Lord, that I was set free from all the sexual fantasy stuff.
Being worried about drug-scares and HIV/Aids, I first took my sons to Sunday School, even before I knew the Lord, as I knew nothing about teaching my sons moral values. Once I came to know the Lord, and I now understood humankind's innate proclivity to depravity, I began to teach my sons Biblical truth and values, and the reasons for those values. (I carried the load of moral and spiritual training, as my atheist husband wasn't interested, being more concerned that our sons become computer-literate, so eventually they became addicted to computer-gaming). During their primary school years I told them why porn, sexual licence, drugs, cigarette smoking, etc., were detrimental, e.g. I told them that porn puts images in their minds that were difficult to erase, that it is addictive and progressive, like drugs, and that it is like drinking from a sewer instead of a pure spring (using the Biblical analogy), and that it perverts God's plan for marriage and sexual relations. Because I knew what a toxic culture we live in, I wanted my sons to "own" the values as their own, not as rules or orders from me. This helped them to withstand many temptations (including internet porn) during their high school teen years, because before they had begun high school, all our sons prayed for salvation as the Lord intervened in their lives, but one later turned away from the Lord and has led an immoral life, despite all my prayers and input, and has become a hardline atheist in the Dawkins mold. He now considers porn less harmful than smoking cigarettes!
I've learned that there are no guarantees when raising children, probably more so if the parents aren't "reading off the same page". I've felt some envy as I've watched other people's children grow into godly young people who love the Lord - but then other people's children haven't. There are hopes and dreams for my family that have turned to ashes, but I still believe God has his hand on their lives and will work in their lives in his timing.

]]> By: Anonymous http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/2013/02/27/raising-kids-in-a-pornified-culture/#comment-74713 Anonymous Sat, 27 Apr 2013 01:42:38 +0000 http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/?p=32151#comment-74713 No offense, but why would the Gospel Coalition have an article like this written by a guy whose never had teenagers? I've raised a son and let me give you the real truth about guys and porn. 1. Your son will be introduced to Internet porn on or before age 10 no matter what you do to protect him. 2. Porn is addictive and you won't be able to shame, badger, or threaten your son enough to make him stop it. It will just go underground. 3. Homeschooled kids manage to find porn too. Don't think your protective covering can keep porn out forever. 4. Like Amy said (3/2/2013), you have to be reliant on the Holy Spirit to change hearts and convict of sin, because you can follow all the steps in the article above faithfully and still end up with porn in your kid's mind. 5. Get acquainted with some of the online help such as the You Tube TEDx talk: "The Great Porn Experiment: Gary Wilson at TEDxGlasgow." 6. If you kid is doing online gaming, be aware that he's probably doing porn. But there is a Reddit/nofap group of guys who want to stop their porn addiction. Without the knowledge or any pressure from Mom and Dad, 55,000 people are taking the Reddit challenge to break away from porn. And it works. God loves your son more than you do. And the Holy Spirit's grip is stronger than you think. Take precautions, of course, but stop badgering and start praying. No offense, but why would the Gospel Coalition have an article like this written by a guy whose never had teenagers?

I've raised a son and let me give you the real truth about guys and porn.

1. Your son will be introduced to Internet porn on or before age 10 no matter what you do to protect him.

2. Porn is addictive and you won't be able to shame, badger, or threaten your son enough to make him stop it. It will just go underground.

3. Homeschooled kids manage to find porn too. Don't think your protective covering can keep porn out forever.

4. Like Amy said (3/2/2013), you have to be reliant on the Holy Spirit to change hearts and convict of sin, because you can follow all the steps in the article above faithfully and still end up with porn in your kid's mind.

5. Get acquainted with some of the online help such as the You Tube TEDx talk: "The Great Porn Experiment: Gary Wilson at TEDxGlasgow."

6. If you kid is doing online gaming, be aware that he's probably doing porn. But there is a Reddit/nofap group of guys who want to stop their porn addiction. Without the knowledge or any pressure from Mom and Dad, 55,000 people are taking the Reddit challenge to break away from porn. And it works.

God loves your son more than you do. And the Holy Spirit's grip is stronger than you think. Take precautions, of course, but stop badgering and start praying.

]]> By: Informed – Issue #23 | http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/2013/02/27/raising-kids-in-a-pornified-culture/#comment-73671 Informed – Issue #23 | Wed, 17 Apr 2013 07:35:44 +0000 http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/?p=32151#comment-73671 [...] in a pornified culture? Here are eight suggestions for this ever-increasing problem. (Click here to read the entire [...] [...] in a pornified culture? Here are eight suggestions for this ever-increasing problem. (Click here to read the entire [...]

]]> By: Kids and Porn = Child Sex Offenders | http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/2013/02/27/raising-kids-in-a-pornified-culture/#comment-70227 Kids and Porn = Child Sex Offenders | Tue, 19 Mar 2013 11:30:46 +0000 http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/?p=32151#comment-70227 [...] your kids. The Gospel Coalition has a recent article with eight suggestions for how parents can “raise children in a pornified culture.” The suggestions are straight forward and practical, things every parent can [...] [...] your kids. The Gospel Coalition has a recent article with eight suggestions for how parents can “raise children in a pornified culture.” The suggestions are straight forward and practical, things every parent can [...]

]]> By: Eating the Poisoned Apple: How Legalism Demonizes Sex | Beggars Daughter http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/2013/02/27/raising-kids-in-a-pornified-culture/#comment-70083 Eating the Poisoned Apple: How Legalism Demonizes Sex | Beggars Daughter Mon, 18 Mar 2013 16:02:14 +0000 http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/?p=32151#comment-70083 [...] Read the whole article here. [...] [...] Read the whole article here. [...]

]]> By: Vale la Pena Notar...Recursos Para Padres | Hombres de Dios 360 http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/2013/02/27/raising-kids-in-a-pornified-culture/#comment-69703 Vale la Pena Notar...Recursos Para Padres | Hombres de Dios 360 Fri, 15 Mar 2013 15:17:07 +0000 http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/?p=32151#comment-69703 [...] Raising Kids in a Pornified Culture by Zach Nielsen [...] [...] Raising Kids in a Pornified Culture by Zach Nielsen [...]

]]> By: Parenting & Pornography | Northbrook Baptist Church http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/2013/02/27/raising-kids-in-a-pornified-culture/#comment-69476 Parenting & Pornography | Northbrook Baptist Church Thu, 14 Mar 2013 14:25:53 +0000 http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/?p=32151#comment-69476 [...] He offers the following eight suggestions for parents (click through to read his explanations): [...] [...] He offers the following eight suggestions for parents (click through to read his explanations): [...]

]]> By: Criando filhos em uma cultura pornificada - Logos Apologetica http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/2013/02/27/raising-kids-in-a-pornified-culture/#comment-69024 Criando filhos em uma cultura pornificada - Logos Apologetica Mon, 11 Mar 2013 21:09:53 +0000 http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/?p=32151#comment-69024 [...] por Pedro Vilela | iPródigo.com | Original aqui Tweet (function() { var po = document.createElement('script'); po.type = [...] [...] por Pedro Vilela | iPródigo.com | Original aqui Tweet (function() { var po = document.createElement('script'); po.type = [...]

]]> By: Messy Mondays meet….I don’t know | The Small Rain http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/2013/02/27/raising-kids-in-a-pornified-culture/#comment-68949 Messy Mondays meet….I don’t know | The Small Rain Mon, 11 Mar 2013 13:52:20 +0000 http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/?p=32151#comment-68949 [...] Raising Kids in a Pornified Culture [...] [...] Raising Kids in a Pornified Culture [...]

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