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Sometimes, older and younger pastors are more alike than different.

Yes, there can be a generation gap when it comes to style. Pastors from different generations may look different, dress differently, talk differently, and think differently. But sometimes, older pastors and younger pastors resemble each other in the way we frame all our opinions in black and white and leave precious little room for shades of gray. My way or the highway! is the unspoken mindset. And so… the elder goes his way, muttering to himself about the shortcomings of the next generation. Meanwhile, the young guy goes his way, openly mocking his father’s ideas as silly and outdated.

In a strange twist, pastors who serve in different ministry contexts and belong to different generations can adopt strikingly similar postures. The style may be different, but the demeanor is often the same. Hard-nosed. Bombastic. Over-the-top.

How to Respond?

So how should those of us who are younger respond to this generation gap? When I talk to friends in ministry, I notice that – instinctually – most of us resonate more with younger pastors, especially the ones who are well-known. They come across as hip, urban, and in touch with contemporary culture. Young guys are likely to give their favorite young pastor the benefit of the doubt. Quick to defend. Slow to find fault.

On the other side, I notice that – instinctually – most of us resist counsel from older pastors, especially when they come across as stodgy, unbending, or out of touch. We’re apt to see some of our elders as grumpy. Thus, we don’t listen to the word of caution, even when it contains wisdom we would do well to heed.

These instincts don’t help us. In fact, they hurt us. And they make us less gospel-centered than we claim to be.

For this generation gap to be bridged, we will have to fight our generational instincts. We need to look beyond the occasionally abrasive tone of older pastors and be willing to receive tough words of counsel. And we need to look beyond the star-power of some younger pastors and realize that not everything young guys say and do is worth emulating.

Fighting the Instinct to Resist Everything

First, we need to pray that the Lord would make us into the kind of people who can receive criticism without being immediately defensive. I confess that I struggle in this area. Whenever I receive criticism that is illegitimate in one area, it’s easy for me to react by rejecting a person’s criticism in every area.

For example, I believe that an older pastor’s criticism of casual dress and contemporary music in a worship service is off-base. It’s easy for anyone to long for the “good old days,” as if the methods of the previous generation were somehow above the culture of the time. Now, in disagreeing with an older pastor on issues related to music, I could say, “Look, he’s out of touch!” and not take into consideration anything else he says. But that instinct needs to be fought. Instead, I ought to hear the other criticisms.

And… I have to agree that there is wisdom in the counsel of older pastors when they tell us to avoid pursuing whatever is new and flashy. We are also wise to recognize that we have some growing up to do. I might not like the way some older pastors come across, but part of growing up means taking criticism like men and not getting too huffy too quickly.

My point is, it’s easy for us to label an older pastor’s criticism as striking the wrong tone and thus write it off. But what if Grandpa does indeed have something important to say? Will we listen, even when we disagree?

Fighting the Instinct to Embrace Everything

Secondly, we need to fight the other instinct we have: embracing whatever our young pastor-heroes say and do, no matter what. There are younger pastors with great influence and many imitators. It’s easy for us to look past the mistakes and missteps of popular pastors, out of generational loyalty. Sometimes, that leads us to defend what should be indefensible. Or it leads us to embrace just about everything from the younger guy and reject just about everything from the older guy. We need to fight the instinct to uncritically embrace the views of our pastor-heroes.

My point is, it’s easy for us to jump on the bandwagon of a young pastor and look past important and sometimes significant disagreements we may have. But what if we need to sharpen each other? What if it’s important to respect a leader without necessarily adopting every one of their positions? What happens when we too quickly accept whatever a ministry leader says, rather than thinking critically and seeking the Spirit’s illumination as we study the Scriptures?

Bridge the Gap

To bridge the generation gap, we need to fight our instincts. We need to work hard to discern truth from error in the teachings of our pastor-heroes. Likewise, we must listen carefully to the criticisms that come from other generations.

Let’s not look only to younger men for our examples of pastoral faithfulness. Let’s also look toward older men who have much wisdom to offer. And at all times, let’s seek to understand our culture and the church’s mission in light of Scripture. It’s time we look beyond younger pastors and older pastors – to the Scriptures that rebuke and challenge us all. We can be – indeed, must be – discerning and missional.

Let’s fight our instincts, so we can learn both from older and younger pastors.

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