In the midst of such a merry season, I sometimes have a meh heart. I often care more about when my package is coming than when Christ will return to make all things new. I am more frustrated at being without creature comforts than I am about friends who are without hope and without God in this world (Eph. 2:12).
If I only prayed for things I care about, my prayers would indeed be poor. Dietrich Bonhoeffer observed in Psalms: The Prayer Book of the Bible that “If we were dependent entirely upon ourselves, we would probably pray only the fourth petition of the Lord’s prayer [Give us this day our daily bread]” (15). I agree.
I’m thankful God knows our frames and remembers that we are but dust (Ps. 103:14). He knows fully what is in the heart of men (John 2:24–25). So, he has not left us to ourselves to design our prayers. Bonhoeffer wonders at the reality that God has not only told us what he has to say to us, but also what he wants to hear from us: “This is pure grace, that God tells us how we can speak with him and have fellowship with him” (15).
If I only prayed for things I care about, my prayers would indeed be poor.
In light of the rich models of prayer God has given us through the Psalms, Bonhoeffer challenges his readers: “The richness of the Word of God ought to determine our prayer, not the poverty of our heart” (15).
We don’t always pray from proper feelings. However, when we pray the Scriptures, we pray ignited prayers—even if they begin with indifferent hearts. Hearts that were once brittle and dry are slowly softened and warmed by the words God himself has given us to pray. Prayers that were once forced and perfunctory become aflame. While God deserves the credit for such a transformation, we receive the joy of hearts more aligned with his passions.
Indifferent Hearts
“I just wasn’t feeling it today.”
“I didn’t want to be inauthentic and my heart wasn’t in it, so I skipped my prayer time.”
If I had a dollar for every time I’ve heard or spoken a statement along these lines in the past five years, I would be a rich woman. As those living in a postmodern, feeling-oriented culture, we tend to let our actions follow our feelings. As such, indifferent and apathetic hearts lead to lacking or lackadaisical prayers.
The writers of Scripture understood that things often work the other way around:
I have chosen the way of faithfulness; I set your rules before me. I cling to your testimonies, O Lord; let me not be put to shame! I will run in the way of your commandments when you enlarge my heart. (Ps. 119:31–32)
The psalmist’s path is already decided, and his feet are already following suit. He knows that his heart needs to change, so he comes to the Lord trusting that God will stretch his heart as he obeys.
In other psalms, we see a similar steadfast commitment to prayer even when the psalmist’s heart feels far from God (Ps. 42; Ps. 73; Ps. 94; Ps. 137). These psalms demonstrate the importance of coming to the Lord in prayer even when we don’t feel like it, and they serve as models we can follow or scripts we can use.
Ignited Prayers
We’re not being inauthentic when we pray psalms expressing emotions we aren’t feeling. We’re training our hearts to align with what God cares about.
When we pray Psalm 45 (a joyful psalm of praise), even though our hearts are welling up with self-pity, we remind our hearts that, in Christ, we have cause for great joy. We also remember that believers throughout the world are rejoicing and praising the Lord, and we shake off individualism as we take our place in the body of Christ.
We’re not being inauthentic when we pray psalms expressing emotions we aren’t feeling. We’re training our hearts to align with what God cares about.
When we pray psalms of lament even when we’re swimming in a sea of abundance, we remind our souls that we are not yet home and that many around us are suffering. We learn to weep with those who weep and rejoice with those who rejoice (Rom. 12:15).
When our apathetic hearts pray psalms crying out for God’s justice, we’re convicted of our myopia and turned toward compassion for those suffering injustice. Our indifferent hearts are softened and stirred into hearts hungering for mercy and justice.
Even if our hearts don’t feel ignited right away, when we pray the living and active words of God, we can trust that the Holy Spirit’s power is at work. As we practice praying the Scriptures, our hearts are shaped to love what God loves, and we are readied to do his will in the world.
May we join Amy Carmichael in her prayer for a heart that more closely resembles God’s:
From prayer that asks that I may be
Sheltered from winds that beat on Thee,
From fearing when I should aspire,
From faltering when I should climb higher,
From silken self, O Captain, free,
Thy soldier who would follow Thee.
From subtle love of softening things,
From easy choices, weakenings,
(Not thus are spirits fortified,
Not this way when the Crucified,)
From all that dims Thy Calvary,
O Lamb of God, deliver me.
Give me the love that leads the way,
The faith that nothing can dismay
The hope no disappointments tire
The passion that will burn like fire,
Let me not sink to be a clod:
Make me Thy fuel, Flame of God.
Involved in Women’s Ministry? Add This to Your Discipleship Tool Kit.
We need one another. Yet we don’t always know how to develop deep relationships to help us grow in the Christian life. Younger believers benefit from the guidance and wisdom of more mature saints as their faith deepens. But too often, potential mentors lack clarity and training on how to engage in discipling those they can influence.
Whether you’re longing to find a spiritual mentor or hoping to serve as a guide for someone else, we have a FREE resource to encourage and equip you. In Growing Together: Taking Mentoring Beyond Small Talk and Prayer Requests, Melissa Kruger, TGC’s vice president of discipleship programming, offers encouraging lessons to guide conversations that promote spiritual growth in both the mentee and mentor.
