I have something of a tortured relationship with Christian books about masculinity. They either baptize masculine traits from a very narrow culture (think beards and barbeques), or they masculinize aspects of godliness that are just as true of women as they are of men (think self-control and sacrifice). Reclaiming Masculinity is uniquely helpful in resisting these twin temptations; it is biblically faithful without being culturally prescriptive. In just 165 pages, Matt Fuller, senior minister of Christ Church Mayfair, presents a biblical vision of masculinity that is careful to not be conflated with a particular cultural stereotype. His goal in this book is to complete the sentence, “To be a godly man means…” (p. 23, emphasis original).

In his introduction, the author surveys contemporary Western culture to highlight the difficulty of his task. He draws attention to the confusion faced by young men across the West who feel “stuck, unsure,” and “sort of stranded” (pp. 12–13) in a culture that treats traditional masculinity as inherently toxic. But instead of engaging in a culture war, Fuller seeks to “outline a positive picture of biblical masculinity” (p. 19). His tone is consistently warm, sensitive, and at times humorous, reflecting over 20 years’ experience as a pastor. That experience also shows in his concern to not simply collapse masculinity into marriage but to write a book for both married and single men alike. What then does it mean to be a godly man? Fuller defines godly masculinity by employing seven key principles.

The first principle frames all others. In chapter 1, the author sets out three different approaches that Christians tend to take when considering the differences between men and women: (1) the “no difference” perspective; (2) the “only two differences” position; and (3) the “differences are clear and must be maintained in a wide-ranging fashion” approach (pp. 28–29). As it happens, these three categories broadly map onto egalitarian and what some have termed “narrow complementarian” and “broad complementarian” perspectives. Charting a via media, Fuller offers “Position 2.5”: “Differences are real and unchanging, but show themselves culturally and therefore differently” (p. 32). In this chapter, the author exegetes 1 Corinthians 11 to lay the theological foundation that makes every other principle plausible. By grounding his approach in the “timeless truths” of creation while allowing for diverse “cultural manifestations of those timeless truths” (p. 36, emphasis original), he deftly avoids the rigid prescriptivism of so many other Christian books about masculinity.

Chapter 2 offers the first substantive principle: “Take Responsibility.” Fuller observes eight creational differences between Adam and Eve in Genesis 1–3, which lead him to conclude: “the man is given responsibility to lead in a way which the woman is not” (p. 48). This responsibility, he suggests, “must have some application to marriage,” “may have some echo of application to single men,” and “definitely has an application to church life” (p. 49, emphasis original). Turning to marriage, Fuller’s explanation of headship (or what he calls “leadership”) is both biblically faithful and pastorally sensitive. He illustrates “what gentle leading looks like” in a way that condemns spousal abuse and cautions against formulaic or mechanistic approaches to decision-making (pp. 54–57). The chapter ends with some reflections on what responsibility might look like for single men.

Chapter 3 begins with the premise that, in general, men are “built to be ambitious” (p. 65). Fuller challenges ambitions that are selfish and builds on the previous chapter by showing that Adam’s leadership was expressed in productive work (Gen 2:15). The chapter concludes by summoning Christian men to be ambitious for “the work of the Lord” (1 Cor 15:58), which, persuaded by the work of Peter Orr (“Abounding in the Work of the Lord: 1 Cor 15:58,” Themelios 38 [2013]: 205–14), Fuller takes to refer specifically to “the ministry of evangelising non-Christians and of building up Christians” (p. 79).

In chapters 4 and 5, the book exhorts men to use their strength for a purpose: to protect the church and to serve others. It begins by exploring Adam’s responsibility not only to work but also to guard the garden (Gen 2:15). This task is later taken up by Israel’s male priesthood and in the New Testament by “men who are qualified by their godly character and biblical doctrine” to be shepherds of the church (p. 96). Chapter 5 importantly acknowledges the embodied reality of male strength which should be used “to protect those who are more vulnerable” (p. 103). It then expands on 1 Timothy 5:1–2 as a framework for masculinity not only in relation to marriage but also to fathers, brothers, mothers, and sisters in the church.

The final two chapters (6 and 7) expand on these broader relationships by calling men to “Invest in Friendships” and “Raise Healthy ‘Sons.’” Fuller writes with honesty, humility, and self-deprecating humour as he shares his own experiences of friendship and fatherhood. These are the most pastorally sensitive chapters of the book as they speak to the “perceived male problems” of loneliness (p. 122) and include single men in the crucial task of being “a father figure in the lives of younger men,” like the apostle Paul was to Timothy and Onesimus (p. 140).

Among the multitude of Christian books on masculinity, this book is unique in its restraint. It avoids caricatures, stereotypes, and tropes that culturally straitjacket biblical truths. Its language is nuanced and its claims carefully worded: e.g., “I think we should expect some echo of this taking of responsibility in all manhood” (p. 62); “on average, men are stronger than women” (p. 103); and Fuller’s favorite phrase, which he often italicizes, “in general” (e.g., p. 20). But this nuance does not compromise the clarity of his message. The book still makes firm biblical claims about the inherent createdness of men as distinct from women. It is not afraid to make general observations from creation about most men, nor does it allow the possibility of exceptions to silence articulating the norm. In this respect, principles 4 and 5 are especially persuasive because they ground biblical masculinity in the general embodied reality of male strength as created.

In some parts of the book, the author makes claims that are theologically fitting but may lack firm exegetical support. For example, he asserts the following about male eldership: “The Bible assumes that there is … something suitable for this role in the male temperament (in general),” such as stoicism, stubbornness, and aggression (p. 96). While this connection might be observable in the created order and even be theologically coherent at an intuitive level, its biblical warrant is less stable. The Bible’s witness about the created temperamental differences between men and women is largely implicit, which should caution us against reading too far beyond the text. Nevertheless, if we are to attempt to articulate these differences at all, we must be willing to at least tentatively consider such theological connections as those made in this book.

Reclaiming Masculinity is a short practical guide for men (and women) seeking a clearer understanding of biblical masculinity without the cultural baggage. It walks the tightrope between the twin temptations of baptizing cultural masculinity and masculinizing aspects of godliness that are shared with women better than any other Christian book I have read.