The images other moms post on social media can be pretty alluring. Now and then I’ll see an Instagram post and think, No spit-up stains on her shirt. Must be nice.
And yet this person is my friend—someone I know. There’s more to her story than this lovely, well-lit picture, just like there’s more to mine. Her smile is hard-won—her friends have hurt her feelings by leaving her out of a recent gathering, her child is having a tantrum off-screen, or she’s recently learned her mom’s cancer is in remission. We’re all going through something.
So please, sister, don’t grow discontent with your life by comparing it to someone else’s social media highlights. When I feel wistful for a stress-free life, I have an opportunity to thank God for putting me exactly where I am in this moment, even if I don’t love how my pants fit or if my house isn’t decorated like something from HGTV. I couldn’t live someone else’s life—and I wouldn’t want to. By God’s grace, I can aim to make the most of the one I’ve got.
Do Your Job
In our family, we have a saying: “Do your job.” My husband, Benjamin, has a Super Bowl ring to testify to his prowess on the football field. But when the time comes for kicking a field goal, I don’t want to see Benjamin running onto the field. It’s not his job. It’s not what he’s been trained for. His position is tight end—he blocks and catches passes. When the team needs a field goal, they send in the kicker, not the tight end.
The same goes for you and me. What’s your job? It’s what you’ve committed yourself to. It’s the people you’ve committed to doing life with. It’s living out your gifts for the kingdom. God has given you a gift that’s missing from the body of Christ until you use it.
God Works Through You
Over the years I’ve wished many times we didn’t have to move so much for my husband’s job. For much of my adult life, I’ve been the new girl who got lots of disbelieving looks for how many kids we have. As a result, I’ve often felt like an outsider.
The difficult things we walk through can connect us to God’s work in the world.
What’s been so interesting is how God has used that “odd mom out” status to draw me to serve other moms. When I hear from moms who feel isolated and overwhelmed, I instantly think, Me too! My particular experiences give me a connection and a sense of empathy I might not have otherwise. The difficult things we walk through can connect us to God’s work in the world.
Though I never in my wildest dreams would have thought I’d be a mom to seven, God works through that role in powerful ways. He uses my gifts and passions—from my love for food to my natural curiosity to my management skills to my teaching background—to help me fulfill my calling.
Your version of the mom life may look different from mine—and that’s how it should be! The important thing is to use the gifts God has given you to serve the people God has given you. You just may be surprised by what he does.
Be a Family with a Mission
If you want to be more intentional about using your gifts for the kingdom, I highly recommend coming up with a mission statement. Such a statement can help you direct your precious resources of time, money, and energy into purposes you want to invest in long term.
A mission statement helps you direct your precious resources of time, money, and energy into purposes you want to invest in long term.
In our family, we chose a Bible verse for our mission statement: “He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God” (Mic. 6:8, NIV).
In succinct language, this verse points our family toward values that aren’t just worthy ideals but God-given commands. It guides our purpose as a family. We’ve committed it to memory, and we have it hanging in a prominent place in our home. It helps us to say an emphatic yes to some things and no to others—without shame or regret.
Dig in and embrace who God has made you to be. Others may not share enthusiasm for the same things, but that’s okay. God’s economy has room for all the gifts, and he will use what you bring him for his glory. Watch and see!
This article is adapted from Sis, Take a Breath: Encouragement for the Woman Who’s Trying to Live and Love Well (but Secretly Just Wants to Take a Nap) by Kirsten Watson with Ami McConnell (Tyndale, 2022).